But, there was one bright spot. Last night, Nick, Jay, and I went to the Notre Dame - Maryland game with my brother, Andrew, a proud Notre Dame grad. The game, itself, was a laugher with Notre Dame completely dominating Maryland right from the opening kick-off. Notre Dame's dominance was so complete that the action on the field had a hard time holding my interest. Luckily, we had the good fortune to be seated right in front of the amazingly awesome Danielle Pignastic.
I can hear you asking yourself -- "Who is Danielle Pignastic?" Let me tell you, after listening to her talk non-stop for three straight hours, I feel that I know her quite well. Let me tell you just some of what I learned:
- Danielle is the type of girl who needs 9 hours of sleep a night. That's why she wasn't going to be able to meet her friends for breakfast this morning. She proposed a late brunch, instead.
- Her neighbors just got a new dog. He's a 17-month old Lab and he's neutered. She has lots of pictures of him on her cell phone and would be very happy to show them to you.
- She's getting her MBA part-time at the University of Maryland. She's annoyed at all the students who are trying too hard to get "A's" since she thinks everyone should just be satisfied with "B's."
- Danielle's friend Chris lives in New York City and says it's a real tough dating scene. Danielle says this is because Chris gets immediately turned off by any guy who's actually nice to her. In fact, Chris had been seeing a guy that Danielle thought was really nice. Chris had been on 3 dates with this guy! Then, he made the mistake of texting Chris. Chris never contacted him again. Poor guy.
- Danielle came to the game with a group of about one dozen friends. One of them was this guy, Dan, who was sitting about 6 seats away from her. Danielle yelled "Daaaannn!!!" loudly every 10 minutes or so during the game. Once, it was "Daaaannn!!! Why are you wearing mittens?" A couple times, it was "Daaaannn!!! Are you going to cheer for Maryland?" Unfortunately, most of the time it was just "Daaaannn!!!" I'm pretty sure that Danielle loves Dan. I'm also pretty sure that Dan can't stand her. By the way, all this yelling for Dan is how I decided to give her the first name Danielle. The last name of Pignastic just kind of fit.
- Danielle had an interesting name for cheerleaders, dance squad members, and marching band baton twirlers. She called them "slutty bitches" as in "Why are our slutty bitches talking to the Notre Dame trombone players?" or "Why doesn't your band have any slutty bitches?" As I'm sure you can tell, Danielle is a real classy lady.
