As I was getting dressed this morning, I realized that my vacation tan is already fading. What a disappointment.
I love tanning. Back in middle and high school, I would start to work on my tan during spring break. While all the more fortunate kids in Elmira headed down to Myrtle Beach or Hilton Head for the week, I just headed to our backyard. As long as there was any sun at all, I'd pull out one of our lawn chairs, face it towards the sun, take off my shirt, and sit there soaking up the rays. I'd sit there for hours. It didn't matter that spring break in Elmira often happened in late March or early April and that it was only 55-60 degrees. As long as the sun was out, so was I. God forbid I was going to let those more fortunate kids get a jump on me with their South Carolina tans.
Obsession with tanning was kind of an Elmira thing. I think it was because the winters were so long and so cold. I remember one time, in high school, a bunch of my friends and I took off from school early to "go play" (that's what we called skipping school) on the first reasonably warm day of the year. We headed out to one of my friend's houses where no one was home, threw on some shorts, and actually grabbed a stick of butter from the fridge to accelerate the tanning process. I ended up smelling like popcorn.
After high school, I got a coveted job as a lifeguard at the town pool. Is there anything better than getting paid to get a tan? I can't think of anything. A typical day at the pool was a ten-hour shift. We'd have four guards on duty. If the pool was crowded, we'd have to put two guards out at a time. That meant 30 minutes on and 30 minutes off. Often, though, the pool wasn't crowded at all. So, each hour I'd spend 15 minutes in the chair and 45 minutes simply lounging around. I was bronze by July 4th, dark chocolate by August 1st, and coffee-colored by the end of the summer.
Unfortunately, life got in the way and my time in the sun has become severely limited. In fact, I'm out in the sun so infrequently that now I often get sun-burned. It's pathetic. That never happened when I was younger. In my mind, only losers got a sunburn. I guess that's not true any longer, right?