Here's how I've spent my first day on the dole:
- I let Kim beat me out of bed this morning. But, I made a special point of coming downstairs before the boys left for school so that I could mock them for having to leave so early.
- After going for my run, taking a shower, and eating a bowl of cereal, it was 8AM. My plan for the day was to finish my fall yard clean-up. Unfortunately, it was raining (which it's done off-and-on all day). So, I headed to the computer to check out my favorite websites. After getting my fill of Penn State football news at www.blackshoediaries.com, checking out the morning headlines on www.CNN.com, and getting my weekend entertainment highlights from www.thr.com, it was all of 8:45AM. I still had a full 12 hours left before I could go back to bed.
- From 8:45AM to 9AM, I sat in the kitchen and watched deer come and go through our backyard. I thought of heading out to chase them off with some ammunition from the "bucket o' rocks" that Nick gave me for Father's Day (he's so thoughtful). Instead, I roused Wallly and Ginger and sent them out in full attack mode.
- Following all that hub-bub, I walked aimlessly around the house til 9:30AM when Kim came home from her walk. When she asked me if I wanted to go to the food store with her, I could barely contain my excitement. I patiently waited while she got ready and made her shopping list and then off we went.
- The food store trip was everything I expected and more. When we got to the parking lot, we split up so I could go to Bagel Bin while Kim headed into Giant. All on my own, I ordered one dozen bagels! Once I made it back to the food store, Kim kept me occupied (and out of her hair) by sending me off on searches for lunch meat, hamburger, juice boxes, and chips. She really knows how to utilize my talent. While shopping, I looked at all the other guys in the food store (there were quite a few) and wondered what they were doing there.
- After stopping by the high school to pick up Jay (the boys had a half-day and Jay stayed after for a while), we headed home. I had a tasty lunch of a leftover roast beef sub from Pudgie's.
- By now it was 12:45PM. Once again, I had absolutely nothing to do. I complained about that for a bit but, at the same time, told Kim she wasn't allowed to give me a list of chores. I headed into the family room and switched on the TV. I watched the Barefoot Contessa prepare a back-to-basics Thanksgiving dinner (roast turkey roulade, herb and apple stuffing, parmesan smashed potatos, cognac gravy, and cranberry fruit conserve) and said a silent prayer that she'd invite me over for Thanksgiving next year.
- Then it was time for some bill paying. No need to dwell on that.
- Now it was 3PM and Nick was getting ready for work. Inspired by the Barefoot Contessa, I whipped him up a tasty meal of re-heated flank steak and broccoli along with a banana. Slaving over that meal made me hungry so I popped myself a bag of extra movie theater butter-flavored popcorn and set a good example by eating 3/4 of the entire bag.
- After that, I went back to the TV but nothing held my interest. So, I decided to do some Christmas shopping. I went up to my dresser, got the catalogs that Kim's been saving for me, opened them up to the pages she'd marked, and went online to "shop" for the things she'd picked out for herself. Thank God she doesn't mind not being surprised on Christmas morning.
- That took me up to 4PM. I put on some Shania Twain ("Up") and sat down to write this. Shania Twain is the best. Jay walked by, heard her, and said "Anyone who says they don't like Shania Twain is just lying to themselves." He is so right.
