I Am A ... Republican?

Today's mailbag had three things in it for me:

• A postcard from Lexus telling me to come on in and pay $169 for a road map update for my navigation system.  Yes, my navigation system needs an update.  No, I do not want to pay Lexus $169 for it.
• The annual fund request from Bucknell.  That's fine.  Bucknell was good to me.
• A letter from Mitt Romney.

You read that third one correctly.  I got a note, personally addressed to me, from Mitt Romney.  I couldn't wait to open it.  Imagine my surprise when I read the opening line.  "Dear Michael," it read.  "I am running for President of the United States and because you are one of America's most notable Republicans, I want to personally let you know why."

What a revelation!  Not only am I apparently now a Republican, I'm a notable Republican.  Times must truly be tough for Republicans if I'm notable.  WaysPaul Ryan's performance in the debate last night really that bad?

In any event, the question I now have is why does Mitt think I'm a Republican?  Yes, I've voted for a couple of them (even if I can't remember all their names).  Yes, I supported the Intercounty Connector project all those years ago, over the loud cries of the environmentalists.  Yes, I complained when Howard County doubled my taxes for fire services, even though there's no fire station anywhere near our house.  And, yes, I live in Dayton.

Is that all it takes to be a Republican, though?  It must be.  I can't wait to learn the secret handshake.