The problem is that HGTV has decided to shake things up for its viewers. For a long time, I knew that, no matter what time I tuned in, I had a 90% chance of seeing "House Hunters," "House Hunters: International," or "Selling New York." I was a happy camper. Then, somebody in the programming department of HGTV decided to get cute.
About two years ago, they introduced us to "Holmes on Homes." Mike Holmes is a big burly guy. His specialty is to find a homeowner who hired a contractor who did an exceptionally shoddy job. Mike points this out to the homeowner (who, quite clearly, already knows tit. Then, he fixes the problem. Have I mentioned that he does all this while wearing bib overalls with no shirt. I'm a fan of bib overalls. In fact, I've asked for a pair for Christmas for the past few years. But, no shirt? Come on. Who needs to see that?
When "Holmes on Homes" was introduced, I sucked it up as best as I could. It was tough, but I did it. Eventually, I learned when it was on so that I could avoid it. Things almost returned to normal. But, this summer, the roof seemed to cave in at HGTV. My old stand-by's disappeared from my prime viewing times of 8PM - 10PM. In their place, joining good old Mike Holmes were "The Property Brothers" and "Love It Or List It."
I don't understand what HGTV was thinking with these two shows. They're just no good. They each have two big problems:
- First, both of them are one hour long. Trust me -- that's entirely too long for an HGTV show. HGTV shows should never last more than 30 minutes. I want to get in quick, live vicariously through someone else for a while, and then get out. I don't want to make a real investment of my time. In fact, if I've only got 15 free minutes, that should be more than enough for me to get the basic gist of the show.
- Second, other than my beloved Kleier's on "Selling New York," no HGTV show needs a personality. Take "House Hunters" and "House Hunters International." They don't even have an on-camera host. Why? Because it's just not necessary. Tell that to the producers of "The Property Brothers" and "Love It Or List It." Jonathan and Drew Scott are the property brothers. Between them, they have exactly zero personality. Don't believe me? Watch them and then decide. On "Love It Or List It," we get David and Hilary (plus Hillary's trusty assistant Desta). I give the three of them a bit more credit -- between them, they have a little personality.
